Because of Jay
F l a s h b a c k s
credits: SoshifiedJanuary 18, 2093
11:59 PM Seoul, South Korea
I could hear the sound of the gagging shore as sharp rocks waited below to be seen upon. My tears drew to my check. The heart no longer lined as my minds controlled my moves. The arctic breeze called my name. The depths of the blue sea echoed my existence. The sound of wrinkled paper crumbled within my grasp, my desperation. Another voice of heartbeat is forbidden to pump another sound. All because of Jay. How could I continue life if he is not here to guide me? How could I take another time to blink if he is not here to be seen? Because of Jay, I cried. Because of Jay, I laughed. Because of Jay, I loved. The life I could have with him, the love that I could have share with him. The voice I could have spoken his name. As Jay staged away, the soul that I’ve lived and captured for these past years, it was not worth it. Only Jay can save me. He saved me once and…again…Jay, can you hear me? If so, let’s be together in our next life. Please, wait for me. I’m coming. The ripples vibrated with a wave as I arrived.December 31, 2092
12:19AM Taipei, Taiwan Taipei Arena Backstage
I felt a bit lost as I walked around the maze full with blind mice. The temperature didn’t move the heart to decrease pressure within the sun rays. My friend, Chae Rin, and her boyfriend, Hyuk Jae, were dragged by my shadows when we stepped forward to my destination. I understood that they were exhausted by the concert. I knew they were forced to come to Taipei with me. As a gift, I accepted their hate and continue to walk a cry. I had Jay’s masterpiece pouched in my arms as I carefully cherished my values like a child in its mother’s side. The roar of shriek arrived when I found a shadow, casting a tingle on my arms. I didn’t think or move but took lead in the marathon. The race was surged with the chromosome of X. I stopped as the other fans crowded around him, Jay. I didn’t blink an inch but heard the steps of running, Chae Rin and Hyuk Jae. The two stopped behind me. The girls of millions attacked Jay with questions and the request of an autograph. I stay behind and focused upon my heavenly king. His hair was combed back, as always, and he had an extension of fake hair. The reflection upon his face was so gorgeous. Jay looked so real, so beautiful in life. It is such a pity that I stand far from his face. I wanted to hold him. I want Jay. It took awhile for the line to shift nearer. I was a slave to music as I waited in line for a satisfaction for my hunger. My pled can hardly wait for an approval as my heart pounded a rip under my chest. My chest was being torn. The girl in front of my anxiety was next as she approached Jay with a surprise hug. I can see happiness as it drew her face upon the heavens. I envied her for being so close on his chest, but at the same time, I feel joy for her content. I knew how she felt. The girl quickly left as soon as the flash of her camera flashed to her great future. I suddenly felt a knot as I felt my guts tightened a twirl in my stomach. My future, my dream has finally reached to its sunrise. Before I could take another breath to blink, my love was right in front of my sight. My heart called from his savior but he did not hear. His charm patiently waited for me, waiting for my next move. The young girls behind my ear told me to hurry because I was making more chaotic events as it plagued the waiting line. I could hear Chae Rin’s voice advising my legs to make the next step. I didn’t move. I was possessed with a statue pose. I exhaled deeply and made a walk. The footsteps that repeated my name swelled me as I’m ready to burst to the tears of joy. It was my only chance. My heart stopped as I was barely half way from Jay’s face. I couldn’t think but slowly spoke up what was bothering me.
“Jay…you…” I shy away as the feeling of burning tar killed my skin while it dissolved my appearance. “You did a really, great, amazing job performing.” I spoke with an accent as it broke to a million of pieces while my eyes dried out. “It was a pleasure to see you perform again. It’s the best thing…that ever…” I paused once as I allowed my chord cry. “…happen in my life.” The tears draped my fingers. “Well…can I have your autograph?” My mouth motored away. He nodded and grabbed my pen. As soon as he finished scribbling, the paper was handed to me. I couldn’t help it but gave a wink of sorrow. I wanted to say more but no words seem to help me speak. “Thank you. Let happiness take form in your life.” I bowed as I frowned deeply into the blues. “Good bye.” I walked to Chae Rin and Hyuk Jae. My tears rolled to my cheeks as my heart ripped into bits. I never turned back. I knew if I turned, I’ll cry. Because of Jay.December 31, 2092
12:49PM Taipei, Taiwan Taipei Arena Backstage
The girl didn’t turn back after she received my autograph. It seemed like she wanted to say more but was urged to leave because of the population in the waiting line. I pitied her. I wanted to tell her and to thank her for her praise. I couldn’t careless but watched her leave. Somehow, I feel for her needs. I felt depress as she took leave. I felt like…I wanted her to stay. But why? If she felt sad, why do I? Am I involved somehow? But I never had seen her before in my life. My eyes studied her as everything paused. The image of her deep cries scarred my heart, my heart began to ache. I stood there as she begged in tears. Her two friends didn’t seem to help as she collapsed onto the ground. I paused for a few minute.
“Dara! Dara! Oh God! Get up, Dara!” Her friend cried s she held the girl. “Her pulse is not pumping. Help!” Her voice echoed. The sound of gunshot. The crying crowd. The blood on my shirt. It all became clear.
I opened my eye. What year was this? When did this happen? I turned and saw myself. A movie premiere? I looked at the date. 2009. 2009? This was 83 years ago. How did I get here? I saw myself as my reflection walked to the crowd. Before I have the chance to blink, I heard a gunshot. The crowd shrieked. I turned and saw my body on the ground, covered in blood. Ran to my body. My eyes widened. I wasn’t shot but the girl, the girl on me, was draped by her own blood. It was her. The girl who cried for me. The girl who didn’t say much…because of me. She blocked me from a bullet. She got shot, she cried, she fell because of me.
My eyes twitched. I’ve got to help her. She got to live. She has more experience than me. She need more help than I could ever have. I ran to her as the girl’s friend dialed the emergency call. I kneeled next to her. The fans stood behind me with their mouth wrapped around their grasps. I lay over her body and listened to her heart. No pulse. I quickly thought as I pushed her chest and donated her air. I could hear soft chatters behind my ear. I aired more and more. It was more than once since I began. It was about my seventh time. Still, she was quiet, unmovable. “Come on. Wake up.” I whispered. “Please, wake up and hear me.” I, the thirteen times, continued. Coincidentally, at the strike of 1AM, the thirteen times, I breathed to her soul. She awakened. December 31, 2092
1:00AM Taipei, Taiwan Taipei Arena Backstage
My tears dropped as I saw Jay in my lens. We made eye contact. I finally have the guts to face my eyes upon his gentle stare. I just feel so weak. My lips tried to move but no description seems to understand my speech. Chae Rin relieved in a deep cry as he slept on Hyuk Jae’s shoulder, covering her mouth. My hands made way to touch the photos of miracle. His face, the textures killed me with an emotional grip. I trembled and exhaled my last breath. I heard the sound of siren. Jay then held me. I was numbed. He ran to the exit and left his fame as it fell onto the fans that held stun in their mouth, full. The running feet dashed behind my curtains. Out we both flew. The air was frosted. The sky was a gloom of purple coffee. I got my eyes on his shirt. I could still see the sweats on Jay after his performance. I tightened my grip on his shirt and cried quietly.
“The girl fainted…but she’s awakened now.” Jay placed me onto the bed.
“She needs more rest.” They lifted me onto the back of the ambulance. I didn’t let Jay’s hands breathe an escape. Chae Rin entered beside me. Hyuk Jae’s eyebrows arched at my actions. The doctor said, “Ma’am. Please let go.”
“Jay. Jay…stay with me.” My tears explained my purpose.
Jay seemed to pity toward my cries. But slowly, he let go. My heart ran. He fell back and was quickly dragged out of my sight when the doctor closed the door. I lost him. I lost Jay.
I covered my mouth. “Jay!” The pulse I felt trembled a quake.December 31, 2092
1:49AM Taipei, Taiwan Hospital
The room was making the Goosebumps appeared on my skin. The pillow surface comfortable under my sleep. I covered myself with the blanket and sighed.
“After you fainted, Jay immediately ran to you and CPR you. He did it about thirteen times or something. Then you woke up.” Chae Rin explained as she gestured to me.
I smiled. “Jay…saved me? Why would he though?”
The door opened. I turned. Chae Rin smiled. “He’s here.”
“Jay?” “Her heart stopped.”
“But how?” Chae Rin talked as she had fear in her words. I peaked and listened quietly.
“We thought that it might be over-excitement that had caused the heart to stop but it was found of a sad heart. Desperation had made her heart stop. Thanks to Jay, she lived. He thought quickly and saved her in time.” The doctor explained.
“Thank you doctor.” Chae Rin, as I could see, was speechless.
“No, no.” The doctor defied. “Thanks Jay. Because of Jay, she lived.”
I stood up tall as I tried to catch his shadows. Quickly, the man who saved my life entered in disguise. A smile drawn on my face as if I was a white paper, waiting to be fold. Chae Rin waved and closed the door. Her shadow waited outside. Before I could start, Jay began with a hug. I had no speech. I rested my head on his shoulders as tears dropped. I exhaled and placed my arms around his neck. He wrapped around me tightly and breathed onto my neck. My exhaled without a word smelled his embrace. I don’t know why he hugged me but I didn’t care. Every moment was an everlasting moment. Every breath we took was our last confession. Every hold in our blood was our tears. I didn’t want to let go. Because of Jay, I lived. December 31, 2092
1:59AM Taipei, Taiwan Hospital
I slowly pulled back, not knowing what I’ve done, not realizing the action that I gave. I could see depression as it casted her sight. Only if she could witness that event I spotted during the incident, she’ll understand my motive.
“Thank you…Jay.” The girl whispered.
“Jay…why did you help me?” She asked.
I was speechless. I didn’t know what to say. “Because…” I could hear my heart walk away. My tears fell. “I…don’t know. I feel like….I. I did what’s best for you. I want to than—”
The girl held my lips to silence. “No need to…I’ve heard enough. Forgive me.” She embraced me. “I feel the same.”
I backed up and wiped her tears. “Thank you.” I stood up and prepared to leave. She wrapped my arms and begged me to stay.
“Jie Lun. I’ve already lost you. I can’t lose you again.” Her tears went my sleeves.
I couldn’t say much because my tongue was twisted. “I’m just happy that you’re fine. I’m happy that you’re happy. No matter what happen…we’ll meet again.” I turned and released her arms. “I’m sorry. I’ve got to leave. It’s for the best.” I heard my tears dripping.
Deep in my heart, I think I fell in love. I knew if I stood longer, she would only cry. December 31, 2092
2:59AM Taipei, Taiwan Hospital
I understood clearly and saw my dear Jay walked farther north. And he was right because I know that we’ll see each other whenever maybe in a different time in a different place. The shot quickly crashed the premiere a girl leaped into the air. I reopened my sight. Everything slowed in my eyes. I gasped as I saw my body painted in blood as Jay rest under my flesh. I reversed my mind as he pressured air into my mouth. My mouth gaggle with life.
“Jie Lun…thank you.” My body fell backward as Jay screamed my name.
He held me tightly as I smelled his charm.
My tears fell as I walked away from Jay. He walked behind me as he headed north. I sadly fled south. “I’m sorry Jay.”
Now I knew so much.
I opened my eyes as the cold water washed my tears.January 18, 2093
12:00AM Seoul, South Korea
My skin became coldly wrinkled by the salt water. I captured my heartbeat with one smile as I saw Jay across me. I reached toward him as he grabbed my hands. Now, I know why Jay saved me. He was unspeakable because he thought I wouldn’t believe his words. But now, I understood. I saved him from a bullet. He saved me from my doom. He knew who I was. He always had. We met 83 years ago and we met each other again at his concert last month. We’re meant to be. No matter how far I go, I’ll always meet him.
And now, why would I kill myself just because Jay’s gone. Will he be happy if I jumped? Jay saved me and I’m going to waste his life from doing that? Why not live off remembering him instead of drying and forget him for eternity? Because of Jay, I cried. Because of Jay, I lived. Because of Jay, I jumped. Because of Jay, I loved.
I could barely feel my feet. I cannot swim with my frozen body. I was frozen. My breath is slowly falling. I cannot move a muscle. I cannot breathe. I’m sinking. I could feel my eyes freezing, closing. I’m falling. A warmth air interrupted my death. I slowly opened my eyes. Jay. He held my face. He embraced me tightly to keep me warm. His lips pressed on mine as he exchanged air to keep my heart beating. Jay quickly swam to the upper world as I held onto his heart. I opened my eyes. I was shivering on land like a lost mermaid. I could see my breath as it iced within the arctic air.
“Jay?” I glared around. No sign of life except the open sea. Beside me was the wrinkled paper with Jay’s face and the headline of the year. I grabbed the paper and squeeze it next to my heart.
Because of Jay, I lived to this day to tell about his rising legacy. Jay, thank you. I love you. See you in my next life. I would not forget your kind and graceful heart. Because of Jay, he’s able to save me again.
I am so happy that there is a Fanfic-thread. Woot woot!
I've been waiting so long for this.
Well, I've got to admit that this one-shot was a little extreme with the obsession.
And I apologize if I am scaring some of you guys. LOL
I just love writing dark stories and one-shots.
I know that this one-shot is a little confusing because I didn't put up the actual story.
If there's any questions, feel free to ask :)